daydream

Sometimes I think I daydream way too much. One time while I was watching tv I was daydreaming that someone was with me. Someone that I wanted to be with. I got so involved in this day dream that when I went to the kitchen to get something to eat I grabbed a two napkinds, one for myself and the other for the person in my day dream. Weird.

Then today I went for a long walk to enjoy the nice weather while it lasts. While I was out I started to day dream. This time Becca calls me telling me that she got out of work early and was wondering if I was free to hangout. I tell her that I am free and that Im going for a walk and I ask her if she wants to join. She says that'd be cool and she could be down there in an hour. I say I could meet her in front of walmart. Then at that moment I realized how far the day dream was going and stopped it.

Is this something to be concerned with? All of this intense day dreaming. Or am I just a hopeless dreamer. I guess I just want to be with Becca badly enough that my day dreams are starting to seem real. Thats kinda scary. I need to control these day dreams, not let them run wild. It puts me in this spot were Im hoping for something that will never happen, not something that may not happen. It is possible that I Becca and I could get back together.

I just wish I knew how she felt. Does she slowly want to get back together or does she just want to stay friends and stay in touch as we go our seperate ways. We did go through about 3 years without seeing each other but that was neccessary. We had dated, broke up and spent time doing our own thing. Seeing other people doing other activities. Activites that we may have never had the chance to do wether it be good or bad if we kept a close relationship. I know Becca is going to a different school in a different state, but if you think about it if Becca dated someone from Long Island it would pretty much be the same, unless that person was from Vermont which is pretty unlikely. If she did date someone from there then they...ok ok I need to stop...this is going to far! Thinking too much! It's like Im planning the future or trying to make up her mind!